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Nathaniel Laurence

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Nathaniel Laurence Empty Nathaniel Laurence

Post by Nathaniel Laurence Mon Sep 01, 2014 10:44 am

NAME: Nathaniel (Nate) Laurence
AGE: 29
CLASS: English Teacher, M.Ed, working on Ed.D.

APPEARANCE: He has light bronze skin, curly dark brown hair, and expressive golden-brown eyes. He has very angular facial features, with a narrow nose and jawline. He keeps his facial hair trimmed to a neat goatee. He has a notable scar running across his right cheek, just under his eye. He stands at average height, about 170cm (5'7), with a very slim figure. He wears a suit while he's teaching classes, but dresses casually otherwise, usually jeans and a tee shirt or hoodie.

BACKSTORY:

He ultimately majored in English and Education, and he graduated in 2016 at the age of 23. However, he struggled to find work in the area, as the educational system was still dragging behind its needs. Nate decided to accept an offer from an English education firm in Japan and leave Vancouver behind.

Since then, he has taught at several different schools, lower grades at first, later higher. He also used the opportunity to complete his Master's of Education, and is now working towards his doctorate. Just this year, he was reassigned to fill a vacancy at an elite private school known as Yamaku Academy.

PERSONALITY: Nate appears to be very easygoing. He is calm and collected in the classroom, but can be strict if he needs to. He'd rather defuse a situation quickly than have it become confrontational. He tries to treat his students with honesty and respect, and expects the same in return.

He is quite friendly and talkative, sometimes too much so. He has a tendency to run off on tangents when his mind is going too fast, but he never really loses track of the conversation. He prefers to think of it as multitasking.

In reality, he is quite insecure, and does not take criticism well. He tries to keep a cool head and talk his way out of situations, but if angered, he can be very bitter and violent. He has trouble making meaningful connections with others, and he does not trust easily. He tries to fill this gap with lighthearted conversation, but it does little to satisfy him. In the end, he still feels he can only rely on himself to protect his own best interest, but he tries to treat others as best he can.


Last edited by Nathaniel Laurence on Thu Sep 04, 2014 10:21 pm; edited 1 time in total
Nathaniel Laurence
Nathaniel Laurence

Posts : 21
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Join date : 2014-08-25
Age : 39

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Post by Subverse Thu Sep 04, 2014 12:24 pm

Sorry it's taken so long to get to this profile - real life takes its toll.

Well organised profile, all the information is laid out clearly and you've used the template we provided, which is always a plus. Appearance is excellent, exactly what we ask for from prospective applicants to the board. The character has a nice backstory, although I do feel it has a severe lack of information there. We're never told the age Nathaniel when his parents break up, the legal battles and how they effected Nathaniel are never detailed properly. His entire childhood is a mystery to us, we don't know about any friends, enemies, hobbies, difficulties, strengths.... The emotional response to his abandonment by his father would also be a major part of ANY person's life, and I really do feel this should be at least mentioned in the backstory. The backstory really does need to be more detailed than it is in its current form - we run a pretty strict policy of "if it's not in your backstory, it didn't happen". For example, you can't suddenly claim your character is fluent in French if it isn't mentioned in your backstory with a good enough reason. I also have a little bit of a problem with the criminal record he would surely have, while Yamaku may be a school about giving everyone a chance... the children's safety would come first, and somebody known to be violent wouldn't never be allowed to teach children.

Profile picks up again in the personality, it's nice and clear and detailed enough to give a good impression of the character.

If you take another look at the backstory and then bump the thread when you've made the necessary changes, we'll get back to you as soon as possible.
Subverse
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Post by Nathaniel Laurence Thu Sep 04, 2014 10:24 pm

Ok, I reworked some of those parts.
Nathaniel Laurence
Nathaniel Laurence

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Post by Nathaniel Laurence Tue Sep 09, 2014 10:54 pm

So...
Nathaniel Laurence
Nathaniel Laurence

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Post by LQ-84i Tue Sep 09, 2014 11:38 pm

Approved 1/2, please wait for another administator's opinion before continuing on.

I will note on the behalf of the other administators that they have increasingly busy lives and probably will not respond to pending matters at the rates they have in the past.
LQ-84i
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Post by Nathaniel Laurence Sun Sep 14, 2014 8:13 pm

anything else I need to rework on this?
Nathaniel Laurence
Nathaniel Laurence

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Post by Raiden Mon Sep 15, 2014 10:54 am

Approved 2/2. Welcome to the forum, and sorry for the delay!
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