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The arrival (OPEN, but obviously, one person at a time)

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Post by Denser Hemington Tue Mar 19, 2013 11:02 pm

"I see. When you heard about it, it seemed... obvious to you."

(He doesn't seem to want to extend on this subject. Let's not push him.)

"So you took that decision, made that pact, and made friends. What did you change exactly? Did you have to force yourself, or was is just a new way of 'pulling the levers' that you hadn't tried before and it became a part of your code?"
Denser Hemington
Denser Hemington

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Post by Satoshi Veach Tue Mar 19, 2013 11:21 pm

"It was something I had to force but now I don't need to."

"I am not a man of fear, but I have to admit that I was afraid of what people would think of me if I actually tried."

"Ever since I did, I've become much much more social naturally."

"I guess it's due to lack of ego that I never came out of my shell."

I take a moment to glance back into Hemington's eyes.

He's putting more thought into this than I thought he would. Very interesting.
Satoshi Veach
Satoshi Veach

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Post by Denser Hemington Tue Mar 19, 2013 11:51 pm

He maintains the eye contact with ease.

(Interesting.)

"You see..."

He crosses his hand above the desk.

"What you just described is really interesting. You forced yourself to change and you fought your urges. You realized that your code was isolating you and changed it. Since your mind and your subconscious are interacting more actively than most of people, you pulled back of real interactions."

"And now you managed to edit the code. To win against what has been driving you since birth. I'm talking about fighting but that's not really it. It's more like... after finding your internal balance, you decided to extend it to the exterior."

He relaxes a bit and adjusts his glasses.

"That is a good step, and I am glad to hear you don't regret. Regretting what we are is one of the worst state of mind."
Denser Hemington
Denser Hemington

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Post by Satoshi Veach Wed Mar 20, 2013 12:21 am

"Grazie."

For a little bit our expressions seem identical as well as our movements minus the glasses gesture (instead of adjusting glasses I brush the hair out of my face).

...'kay-that's a little strange.

"So what do you think? What are your thoughts on it all as a whole?"
Satoshi Veach
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Post by Denser Hemington Wed Mar 20, 2013 8:46 pm

(Is he... copying my attitude? I wonder if he's realizing it.)

(Hard question. Okay, gather your thoughts and recap.)

He thinks for a bit and takes a breath.

"Let me recap a bit."

He adjusts his glasses.

"You've been experiencing urges. Urge to take efficient actions and to act different. You realized you liked to witness people's reactions. To startle them, surprise them."

"You have this code. In your mind, as you said. When you try to escape it for too long, you snap. You got used to lay back into it and pull some levers depending on the situation you're confronted to."

"There may be a connection between the lack of friends and this. That's an obvious statement, but let me detail it. Your code made you isolated, maybe ignored. But you saw that some of your reactions made people react more. Whether they'd be scared, startled, shocked. Strong reactions. You liked that. Lacking a normal interaction, you decided to go with this. At some point, our discussion seemed like a mind game, you trying to make me react, to surprise me. Which you did a few times, I admit."

He chuckles and goes right back in serious mode.

"Your 'strange' urges may be linked to your self isolation. Some kind of attention seeking. That's the way you communicate with people."

"Now you changed, and discovered you could do something else to interact with them. And you made some friends."

"This urges were, are... your way of showing the world you exist."

"That is what I think, Veach."
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Post by Satoshi Veach Wed Mar 20, 2013 10:16 pm

I sit back without saying a word for about 20 seconds with my eyes closed.

It's not due to my disability. It's more like a mental recap and check of a few past mental notes I've made ont the subject of my mind that I can remember.

Sifting through the most important down to the very least that my mind has deemed useful for my conciousness to remember.

"That...would generally make sense."

Careful not to be hit by the Forer Effect and believe it just because it was told to me, I give it some more thought.

He did pretty good for speaking about a subject with no correct answer possible to give in this manner of study. This has satisfied my hopes on how good of an answer I wanted.

I can deem this as true.

So far I now have two answers to my mental state that I both believe to be true.

One: My mind learns from it's mistakes at a higher rate and adjusts itself to become better at every possible moment. Doing everything to become more intelligent on issues the my mind naturally deems most important and then funnels any information gathered having to do with mostly those subjects into my consciousness to use. Leaving out any access information that it thinks is useless without asking my consciousness if it really is or not.

And now two: My mind is still in it's 'honeymoon' setting with the social interations. This creates a hunger to do such things for attention even if I never was the type of person to do such a thing.

Great going, mind, you're making me look like a douche!


I give a smirk after a little silence.

To give an idea at how much I am thinking-I thought of a story concept involving: space exploration, wormhole fuel source technology, and the mental process of humans driven by both greed and their emotions and then afterward though up the mental detail of the main character in a couple seconds.

This has been about 25 seconds of almost uninterrupted thought.

"This session has been very informative and clarifying. Thank you very much, Hemington-senpai."

I stand and offer my hand.
Satoshi Veach
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Post by Denser Hemington Wed Mar 20, 2013 10:35 pm

He waits patiently for your silence to end.

(Seems like I was able to help him. This feels nice.)

He takes your hand and shakes it only once, giving a genuine smile.

"You are very welcome."
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Post by Satoshi Veach Wed Mar 20, 2013 10:42 pm

I return the favor with my trademark grin in place of a smile before giving a bow and taking my leave.

Refreshed.

Such an interesting man...

I don't know it yet but I will soon be visiting more often for small moments at a time.

This of course starts a rumor of two but I don't really care enough to stop.
Satoshi Veach
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Post by Denser Hemington Wed Mar 20, 2013 10:51 pm

(This was fascinating. Really interesting.)

He takes his notepad and starts writing, a hand resting on his cheek.
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