[Private] Last Night I Dreamt That Somebody Loved Me

In the haze of unconsciousness, I had the realization that perhaps...perhaps Chiyo was right. And Yuuji as well. That I indeed was a failure as a human being that even calling myself human would bring shame upon the worthy are actually earned the title. People speak of losing humanity or regaining humanity but what if from the outset, I was never destined developed into one. Not even one's shadow. No...I was a walking miscarriage of wasted genetic material some special, saintly being could have been spawned from - I blame my father for this. But how can I blame a nonexistent character, never written, for the direction of a play that he played no part in and I, and only I myself, written and directed along this ill fated course across the unknown charters of life? in particular, my life?

It was this question that, unanswered, led me to consider using the nearby station to do the dirty work for me as even my hands defied me in my first attempt to die. My feet committed mutiny as well. I am a coward. Not even the thought that I will cease in existence can bring a hint of joy or brief respite to my turbulent soul. The Smiths once said "There's another world....a better world" but honestly that's only to deter our tender eyes from the unrelenting pain and disappointment of the world and its processes. Something meaningful waits beyond this nihilistic wasteland of tears and strife and struggle.

But then, I come to from such a delusion to see a silhouette come into focus above my bed in a violent, bright light cast from the hospital fluorescent light fixture.

"Asano-san."

The blur speaks. In a loud manner, however, the sound eminating from it is quite soft. Growing in volume.

"Ms. Asano. That is your name, isn't it?"

The voice seems to speak softer, though still growing in volume.

*English*"A', Hell. What'd I get myse'f into?"

And back to louder speak.

The blur starts to focus into color and better shape.

"Hey, come to me, miss. I don't have all day."

"Ah, there you are. Are you alright, Asano-san? Can you move?"

////Earlier\\\\

God, what the Hell, man-I just wanted to have a peaceful conversation with the girl. Now I'm in a hospital, looking after her since I doubt her relatives will be able to visit her for a little since the nurse looked up her name in the local phone book and couldn't find anyone with the name Asano around here.

I still feel guilty going through her stuff to find any identification I could.

I know the nurse needed it to attempt to find any information on her family, but still.

Feel like I need to wash my hands to get rid of the guilt.

Now, I sit in the poor girl's hospital room, watching over her, and drawing in my sketch book.

That's how it stays for much time. Hours.

By now, I'm done with touch-ups on my drawing in the mall I've come to call 'Falling Asleep' and continued a concept sketch of an alien race for one of my various stories I come up with over time.

That is, until I notice the body under the sheets of the hospital bed stir...

She's waking up!

I set my pad down and move over to the bed.

"Asano-san."

"Ms. Asano. That's your name, isn't it?"

What is she going to think when she wakes up? She was flipping on me before she-...

*E* "A' Hell. What'd I get myse'f into?"

"Hey, come to me, miss. I don't have all day."

Her eyes start to open a little and blink.

"Ah, there you are. Are you alright, Asano-san? Can you move?"

"How many fingers am I holding up?"

Heh heh, if this was Hawke, I'd totally be flipping him off right now.

I hold up three. Each with very small seperations between to make it a challenge for someone with poor vision. A bat could answer the question correctly if I held them up normally.

I gaze despondently at the person standing above me and I raise a middle finger before putting up my index and ring finger as well. My hand drops back to my side anticlimatically.

[Dang website shutting down. Completely lost a long post. >.<]

'D she just flip me off?

"Hey-I could of left you by yourself but I helped you instead. I don't expect anything in return but insults also fall under the category of 'anything.'"

My arms fold like a parent's.

At least she can see alright.

I roll my eyes and go back to my seat and draw.

"Tch, whether you've just decided to hate me or not is irrelevant. What is important right now is getting you up to speed."

We wouldn't want any confusion to start another reaction and send you to the afterlife now, would we?

"We are at the closest hospital to the mall."

"The time is.."

I automatically look at my wrist, only to remember that my watch ran out of batteries and then pull out my phone.

"..a little after 7pm."

"A few hours ago, you started to convulse inside of Paulownia Mall."

"You've got a bump on the side of your head from hitting the floor. Luckily, that is the only injury you have.

"I got a by-stander to call the appropriate number to get you here while I did my best to stop you from injuring yourself further."

"Now. Do you remember me at all? I know occurences like that can cause a small amount of amnesia since I've experienced it more than a few times."

I squint at you and turn away in embarassment.

"I thought you were the doctor. I hate doctors. Money grubbing shits."

Shaking my head, I say:

"No...yes, I remember you. You were asking all of those questions and showing me something....I can't remember.."

"Judging isn't fair. You just need to find the correct doctor."

I start to turn a few pages on my drawing pad.

"I only asked how-"

I flip to 'Falling Asleep' and then stop myself.

Terrible, horrible, no-good, very bad idea!

"-..a drawing of mine looked."

"Anything else I said wasn't in question form. You ended up seeming to lose consciousness for a second and then got creeped out when I woke you up."

"After that you said you zoned out and, when I mentioned your eyes were shut, you-..."

I rub my left arm.

"You kind of got irritated with me for some reason."

She was going to say the reason that happened...must of been caused by the seizure she was about to have....

"Then...that's when you-..you fell."

My voice is filled with mixed emotions at the end of my last statement.

I stare at the curtains fluttering off to the side.

"...I see."

Shrugging, I turn on my side, pulling the covers up over me.

"Sorry. I was a burden."

I have a slight, empty cheer in my voice

"No you weren't. You just scared me is all."

The cheer fades to an ominous, grey feeling.

"I'm glad you happened to sit by me because I was able to see you to the hospital and find out your family doesn't live around here and that you needed company while you rested."

Ah, that's right.

I snap my fingers. A pep that wasn't there previously appears at the promise of a better topic.

"Speaking of the devil! Would you like to call your parents or something? I'm certain they're quite worried about you!"

She's got a disability.

"-Unless you're a new arrival at Yamaku, in which case it may be a friend, perhaps?"

"No."

After the word, family and parents, I automatically shut everything out.

"I have no family. I just want to go back to my dorm and wait for school to start.

"O-..oh..."

I uncomfortably shift a little in my seat.

"W-well, do you have some type of guardian while the hospital prepares to release you?"

"....No."

Bullshit.

"Oh..sorry..."

I lower my head further.

Yamaku is a private school-and one that costs money. Not only do you have a guardian but, if you are unwilling to talk about them, you have parents. You're just not in good relations with them.

I pick my head back up and talk directly to Riye.

"Well, let's call the nurse then..I'll stay with you until your ready to go. Then I'll leave you so you can head back to your dorm."

I stand and press the button on the remote for the nurse.

Either you're upset that you were sent here or they sent you here because they didn't want you there.

The second reason is less likely.

An older woman in bluish-green clothing comes into the room.

'You're awake!'

'OH-um-did you talk-'
"Yeah."
'-about thee~um-'
"Yeah."

'Okay, good. A~nd?'

"I took care of it."

I'm taking...maybe. I don't know.

I hope I'm of any help.

I glance over to the girl in the hospital gown.

What she needs right now is a friend. One that doesn't care about the negatives and ifs that come with her...

Hm, I wonder how much is going to happen with her in her stay at Yamaku.

'Wonderful.'

The woman returns her attention to the frail-looking girl.

'Ms. Asano, I'm Saito, I am your nurse. How are you feeling this evening?'

Meddling.

"I'm feeling. Particularly how scratchy these covers are."

'Well then, lets get you out of those, shall we?'

The next half-hour is pretty uneventful.

Just a few 'sign here and here's. Then I was out of the room and then I was in the room and Asano changed into her street cloths.

"Well, I guess I'll see you around."

Before I know it, the hospital entrance is behind us.